Nancy Pelosi to Star as Cruella De Vil

cruelladevilleWhile the announcement to remake the classic 101 Dalmatians might have normally gotten two yawns from film critics, Hollywood’s buzzing with the news that Congresswoman Nancy Pelosi (D-CA) will star as Cruella De Vil, in the new movie Cruella, scheduled to be released November 2016.

Directed by Cameron Burton, this film is a twist on the Disney classic, focusing on the nemesis Cruella De Vil.  “In past films of 101 Dalmatians, the focus was really more on the plot than any one character,” said Burton at Friday’s press event. “I think by focusing on Cruella, we can get inside her evil mind and understand why she is the way she is.”  Burton hopes to shed some light on this otherwise dark character, obsessed with slaughtering dalmatian puppies.  “That insatiable, inhumane desire comes from somewhere, and that’s what this film really explores.”

Director of Cain, the Confederacy, and Jafar’s Revenge, Cameron Burton is no stranger to remaking classic stories from the villain’s perspective.  This time he’s taken on a new challenge- giving the lead role to a Hollywood newcomer.

“I believe Representative Pelosi will do amazing in this acting role” a spokesperson for Pelosi commented.  “Mrs. Pelosi is very comfortable in front of the camera.  She connects with her audience and has a natural ability to create a sense of realism and importance.”

When Director Cameron Burton was asked why he chose Pelosi, he said, “When I was approached about directing this film, I said, ‘If this is going to work, we need a believable character.  We need someone who can appear likable but can really draw out the pure evil of this woman.'”  Burton admitted that he was initially hesitant about casting a Hollywood novice and a politician for the lead role, but then he started watching interviews and her press conferences.

“She’s ruthless,” Burton added.  “She sees a weak spot in her opponent, and she goes after them.  Normally, people might think of her as a bully, but she still garnishes this sense of loyalty.  She gets elected and reelected.  And she’s very determined to go in her direction, no matter what arguments the opposition presents. That’s when it dawned on me; she’d play a perfect Cruella De Vil.”

Even though the flick won’t be released for another year, much of the film has already been shot.  When asked what challenges he faced working with Pelosi, Cameron Burton explained, “She really did an amazing job.  I don’t think I’ve ever had to retake so few scenes.  That just goes to show you that we chose the perfect person to play the role.  But with any actor or actress, you’re always going to have to coach them through overcoming their habits.”  Burton explained that they had to help Nancy with exposing her hidden evil out on camera.  “I think she’s used to keeping that hidden from the camera,” explained her acting coach Hillary Reid.  “Acting for a movie is a little different than politics.  It’s like we’re opening the door on closed meetings and hidden behavior.  The audience needs to see everything.”

Reid added that there were other habits that Pelosi needed to break.  “A few times when she was to yell, ‘Puppies!’ in that ‘I’m excited to slaughter them tone,’ she kept yelling, ‘Babies!’  That was a bit of a disturbing challenge,” commented Reid, “but I guess it’s to be expected.  You could call it an occupational hazard.”

While much of the film has been shot, there still remains a few unfinished scenes.  Director Cameron Burton admitted that it is challenging working with a politician because of having to work around her busy schedule.  “Mrs. Pelosi is scheduled to resume acting over Congress’ winter break,” commented her spokesperson.  “Obviously she’s been extremely busy capitalizing off of Speaker Boehner’s resignation, fighting allegations that Planned Parenthood is profiting off of selling fetal tissue, and the recent visit of Pope Francis.  As a devout Catholic, Representative Pelosi wanted to ensure she fit Pope Francis’ visit into her very busy schedule.  But not to worry, the show will go on.”

Look for “Cruella” to hit theaters right around election time next year.
Disclaimer: This article is a parody and not to be taken seriously.


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